♥ ASHKISSED

ashkissed @ 2009-08-13T15:32:00

2009-08-13T07:33:39Z

we are kings.

2009-07-22T17:34:48Z

So now i get what the whole FOC hype was all about.

Honestly, i was dreading it, thinking that dammit 5 days is an awfully long time to be away from home.

But i have to say, FOC rocked my socks.

I absolutely love the kings
All ready and set in our hobo chic outfits for bash night.
We're supposed to be homeless bohemians, but i think we don't look very homeless do we.

Bash night was entertaining.
Check out all the guys who crossdressed. Sure takes alot of guts. Kudos to them, really.
And these are only a few out of the many who did.

Other highlights of FOC-

THE AMAZING RACE
which made me leave a mental note to self- i need to get my stamina back.
All the running about from pasir ris to arab street to plaza sing back to bugis to seletar to mt sophia to smu then back to pasir ris. Left me with a very sore toe, yes i know i'm very lousy.

Games were hilarious. This one left me in laughing fits.
Chongyew and bob in banana showdown. It was funny to watch.

This is probably the moment to remember.
The game to prove that we're worthy to be students of ADM.
Jingliang rocked this one.

LASERTAG
The game i absolutely love, but apparently suck at.
I died too fast for me to enjoy the game, but had fun anyway.

We look so harmless.

PAINTBOMB
The game whereby we all made an agreement to just try to stay out of the game while the others fight for victory.
But apparently joseph started bombing all of us from the same team and we just started mad throwing paint bombs at one another.
Mad scene. All i can remember is,
-Me running everywhere like some headless chicken with bombs flying here and there.
-Me randomly throwing a bomb at a guy from the opponent team resulting in 5 other guys from that team charging almost immediately at me. scary shit.
-Kit suddenly appearing from no where trying very hard to bomb me.
-Me running away from him when fareez came in from the right, splashed a pail of blue paint all over me. Paint in my ears, the feeling was sick. I was half blue.
- Mass hugging when everyone gave up trying to run away.

Us and our very own personalised tees. I actually love it.
Took the longest bath in my life to get rid of all the paint.

FRIGHT NIGHT.
I realise i spew alot of vulgarities when i'm scared. Bad.
I am timid, that's it. Fright night scared the hell outta me.
Screamed the loudest and ran the fastest than i ever did.
Chongyew makes a freaking good zombie.

Pitstop.
Hazri and elisha. I love them because they are all equally timid. Hoho.

THE KINGS.

My favourite shot out of the many we took. What a happy bunch.
I love jump shots even though i got blocked out.

Yay.
I love being back to school.

P.S: credits to all those whose photos i stole from FB!

ashkissed @ 2009-07-09T23:18:00

2009-07-09T15:18:30Z

I NEED TO QUIT CABBING.

ashkissed @ 2009-07-08T01:17:00

2009-07-07T17:19:16Z

Sometimes i wonder if anything's absolute anymore. Is There Still right and wrong, good and bad, truth and lies? Or is everything negotiable,left to interpretation, grey. Sometimes we're forced to bend the truth, transform it, cause we're faced with things that are not of our own making. And sometimes things simply catch up to us.

-one tree hill

if everyone has his own niche, then what do we do in common?

2009-07-03T17:29:04Z

I chanced upon my old blog and it got me looking back at my old entries dated all the way back to 2005.
Makes it even clearer that things have really changed.

How i seem more carefree last time. And i really really miss that.
But now problems just seem to pile up and we have what else but obligations.

Life in school is always the best.
I think i started working too early, made me the person i am today.
Work gives you experience but it also wears you out.
And shows you the many faces of people.

If i had a chance, i'd do everything very differently.
I don't think i'm very happy right now with how things are turning out, and i never seem to be contented.
But then again, that's what everyone says-
that if they could turn back time, they would have done this that way yada yada yada.
Because i think humans are generally very fickle minded and can't decide on what they really want.

It churns a very sick feeling in my stomach everytime i think about what lies ahead.
Do you ever feel like all you wanted to do is run away?
Because i feel that all the time.

Gawd, make this quick.

cold cold heart

2009-07-02T17:40:47Z

There was a time when I believed that you belonged to me
But now I know your heart is shackled to a memory
The more I learn to care for you, the more we drift apart
Why can't I free your doubtful mind and melt your cold cold heart

- cold cold heart, norah jones

change is the only constant. (And that sucks)

2009-06-29T16:00:30Z

As we grow up, problems get magnified and we find ourselves having more obligations.
I hate the feeling when we have to do something just because everyone else is doing it and we have to too.
It's like when we were young we can screw something up and it's still okay, because there seems to always be a next time.
But now if we screw something up, it's almost as if that's it.
I hate being in somewhere new where i have to start getting used to the environment all over again.
Same situation, some people can get so hyped up about it, and i'm here feeling very numb.
Sometimes i really don't get it.

Ah crap.
Bottom line is- i seriously hate changes.

Can someone tell me i'm not the only one who's paranoid and i'm not thinking too much =/

KOTA TINGI

2009-06-24T15:58:41Z

So we finally got to go overseas together.
Well, not exactly anywhere very far but at least it was like a mini getaway together.
And to get away from my hectic schedule, it's good.

Our destination was KOTA TINGI.

I need more fresh air and cloudy skies like that.

We went to the ostrich farm.

And they just kept following us around, so easily attracted by any slightest movement.

Baby Ostriches are the cutest! Look at those wings.

The downside was, the weather was crazy (what's new) and lunch/dinner sucked.
Other than that, everything else was great.
At least we got to see very very pretty fireflies before we headed back home.

We took a total of 231 pictures using my camera alone.
Kokyong's camera, i don't wanna imagine. Everyone was just snapping away.
The rest of the photos are in FB as usual.
I'm getting lazier and lazier with the uploading of photos. SO SLOW!

Anyway, on a very very random note, i'm left with 6 more days before the end of full time work *YIPPPPPPE!*
You have no idea how glad i am :D

P.S: I'm gonna make it a point to update my blog more. HAH!

Updates of the fat little monster.

2009-04-14T14:49:24Z

Having a puppy at home makes everyone so happy.
Although he's one hell of a monster, you still find it so hard not to love him ;)

WHHHHEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

2009-04-08T17:07:59Z

I am very happy, thankful, elated, grateful, overjoyed, yada yada yada :D
So good things do happen to me afterall, but this time i really worked for it. YAY YAY.
I love my friends because they are all so supportive and so excited for me.
THANK YOU :D :D :D

ashkissed @ 2009-04-04T21:10:00

2009-04-04T13:14:51Z

I am very proud of myself today.
Say goodbye to the grouch.

HOHO.

ashkissed @ 2009-04-03T19:11:00

2009-04-03T11:13:13Z

I am outside
and i've been waiting for the sun
And with my wide eyes
I've seen worlds that don't belong
My mouth is dry
with words i cannot verbalise
Tell me why we live like this

ashkissed @ 2009-03-24T19:27:00

2009-03-24T11:27:31Z

I need to stop losing myself,

wreck

2009-03-21T19:09:13Z

I hate turning points.
Because that's where i always get stuck.

I totally get it when people tell me it's no big deal, that i worry too much for my own good.
I really get where they are coming from, but when it's me in the situation, i just can't help having all this mixed feelings.
I know what i should do, but i'm paranoid and scared.
People get frustrated with me when they ask me what is it i'm scared about and i can't tell.
I'm not exactly sure myself. But i think i'm scared of change?
I like knowing what's ahead and ambiguity really scares me.

At some point, everyone has to make some life changing decisions.
And i'm really done regretting choices i made.
That is why, this time round, i'm really indecisive and in a mess.

There are times when i think i've got it all sorted out.
Then i make promises that i'll make the best out of whatever i've decided.
Then maybe the next day, i'll be back to square one feeling vexed all over again.
I really really appreciate those who bothered to listen, talk and assure me.

For now, i'm still uncertain.
And i need a little more time to piece it together.

ashkissed @ 2009-03-18T15:24:00

2009-03-18T07:27:18Z

i need a sign.

very ugly.

2009-03-13T18:27:59Z

Maybe it's just me.
But i really don't get how people laugh over something like, suicide?
Something tragic happens, but people make a joke out of it.
What if it was a friend, a family member or just someone you knew?
You'd have react differently.
This is the problem with people. We make a joke out of something because we're not the butt of the joke.

Seriously, i'm disturbed.

ashkissed @ 2009-03-10T00:56:00

2009-03-09T16:57:58Z

omggggomg. who wants to go to oasis' concert with me!

nine crimes

2009-03-07T12:58:14Z

I absolutely love love love love love this song.
Gotta turn up the volume a bit, but it's really good.

cold cold heart

2009-03-03T14:56:51Z

I really don't believe that anything is unconditional.
It must really take alot for someone to not expect to get anything out of something they do.
And i, am not such a big person.
Unconditional meaning we love someone regardless of their actions and behaviors.
I'm not saying it's entirely impossible, just that it has yet happen to me.
We befriend someone hoping to get friendship in return. That's conditional.
We love someone in hope that they will love us back. That's conditional.
If someone treats you like crap, doesn't spare a thought for you but yet you still love him irregardless, then yes that's unconditional.
And it's also impossible.
It may be possible in the short run, but after that it wears you out.

The one phrase's stuck in my head ever since i watched one tree hill a few years back.
People always leave.
It takes so much effort to maintain a relationship. At the end of the day, how many can actually stick through?
It's so hard to find anyone genuine nowadays. Or maybe it's also because i've met too many pretentious people along the way.
Fake colleague, fake friends, fake people everywhere.
People always say one thing and mean the other.
It makes me very scared to meet new people nowadays.
You meet someone new, you get to know him/her, make efforts to work the friendship/relationship out. Sometimes it doesn't work, you get upset for a while, then you move on. The next person comes along, you start all over again.
People after people. It's really tiresome.
I don't know if it's just me, but friendships we built when we were younger seem more true and are longer lasting.
Then again, maybe it's because we start seeing the ugly in people as we grow up and certain things that didn't matter before matters now.

I am losing faith in things i used to believe that i can do well in.
I used to give myself this big promise that i will keep in contact with all my friends.
Then as time passes, we all get caught up with our own issues and people start to drift.
Not only for friendship, it seems as though whenever i hold expectations for something, it never happens.

The feeling of being disappointed all the time.
It eats you up.

Bottom line is.
People let you down.
Then at some point, you wear out until you become indifferent.

I don't believe in promises because no one sticks to them.
If you have to promise something, do it.
Say something only when you really mean it.
If not, don't. Because i don't think i can take it very well.

Like it's been a long time coming.

2009-02-27T16:54:29Z

It's been seven weeks since i last partied,
four weeks since i drank anything alcoholic,
three weeks since i met a friend for a proper lunch/dinner,
two weeks since i last shopped,
one week since i called anybody unless work related,
one day since i last got everything, well, almost everything done!

Really, PHEW.

I feel like the most tired person on earth with never ending things to do. I don't know why, they just keep coming.
Although i still have three big jobs on hand, at least i have a bit of breathing space.

I have to apologise for going into hiatus mode. But i really needed time to myself.
Feels like the mad project rush during school days all over again.
With me rushing work till seven in the morning, catching a wink for two hours before rushing to get things done again.
Anyway, sorry to those i was grumpy towards!
At least i'm back now :D

Which means, I NEED A GOOD PARRTTYYY soon.

Speaking of which, i was indecisive about going to dblo with the zoukcrew or to get some rest at home.
But i ended up bringing mocha to meet some puppy friends.
I'm glad i did anyway, because my pup was really one happy pup.

I couldn't get a proper shot of them because the three puppies couldn't stay put even for a while.

Anyway,
I have to make a disclaimer-

FREElance is NOT FREE.
So stop coming to ask me, to put it nicely, for favours.
Because, i'm not very nice, not very charitable and not very free. Special case only if you're in my top ten friend list.
So don't come and tell me you're a friend of a friend or a brother of a friend or a long lost friend or what.
Not going to work, THANK YOU V MUCH!

Okay that's about it.

GREETINGS FROM MOCHA!

ashkissed @ 2009-02-13T17:13:00

2009-02-13T09:14:29Z

Please please please please please make it happen.

:(

ashkissed @ 2009-02-06T16:49:00

2009-02-06T09:17:29Z

It's true that time passes quicker when we're having fun.
Especially when it's been so long since i had some time to myself without having to think about obligations like work and people.
Getting away for a day or two, just what i needed.

Next time i'll have a rooftop jacuzzi of my own too.
Simply relaxing ;)

I love the boyfriend for bringing me to see these cause i'm a sucker for pretty things.
It's quite amazing how they use water ,lights and music to do up some synchronisation.
I'm not a fireworks person but these are really worth watching.

;)

For an uptight person like me, i really need more getaways.
February's too short a month to waste time.
I need to fight deadlines now and stop running away.
Yes, stop running away.

My mind's spinning just at the thought of it.

I need a sign.

2009-02-01T17:46:07Z

Deadlines are drawing near.
I am a procrastinator.

Deadlines and procrastinators don't go well together.

Black face monster.

2009-01-31T04:15:11Z

My black face monster is the first thing i see in the morning now.
SO CUTE :)

He loves my flower cushion and he's happily chewing on his dental stick.

^^

Oh, and the other day i was surfing online randomly and i saw my boyfriend in the background of someone's photo. Haha.
Makes you wonder, how many times were you in the background of someone else's photo.

ashkissed @ 2009-01-30T01:30:00

2009-01-29T17:34:19Z

I'm eggggggcited again :D

CNY this year, is not bad for a change.
Saturday meeting up with the classmates again.
And my last minute sunday home party seems to be receiving good responses.
Very well! I love having things to look forward to.
And and the boyfriend's surprise celebration seems to be looking good as well.

Just needed to spill my excitement somewhere.
I am so easily contented i know :D